1,285 words / 9:45
I’ve spent my entire life thinking I’ve found the lowest common denominator, only to find a denominator even lower and more common than the previous denominator. But I think I’ve finally found it — THE lowest common denominator. Actually, two lowest common denominators, because as John Donne famously said, “No boy is an island.”
As my tough luck would have it, I stumbled across a little one-minute video from October 2021 of two imbeciles in a pool crooning with fake Jamaican accents in that awful whiny style of pussy-whipped “singing” that has disgraced the Urban Mating Song genre for at least a generation now. The song was called “Island Boy.” That video became an online sensation, which allowed the pair of poolside cretins to record a pro version of the tune that 24 million people have watched so far.